Motormouth: The V12 days of Christmas
Too many Christmas goodies caused a sugar rush in me and I had to “clear carbon” with a random Xmas column.
As always, the most popular Christmasy song played on every local radio station during this year-end holiday period was Mariah Carey’s All I Want For Christmas Is You.
The song is catchy and her voice is lovely, but after hearing it ad nauseum since mid-December, all I want for Christmas is definitely not Mariah Carey singing her greatest Christmas hit.
I would gladly listen to any classic Christmas carol instead, such as The Twelve Days Of Christmas.
Speaking of which, I imagined how an automotive version of the song might go. Its title would be The V12 Days Of Christmas.
The Yuletide gifts on the imaginary list would be way more meaningful to a motoring enthusiast than drummers drumming, pipers piping, lords leaping, ladies dancing, maids milking, swans swimming, geese laying, gold rings, calling birds, French hens, turtle doves, and a partridge in a pear tree.
Here goes…
🎶 On the V12th day of Christmas, my true love sent to me:
Twelve cylinders pumping
Eleven exhaust pipes a-piping
Ten-year car life afresh
911s in action
V8s in concert
Seventh heaven in a 7 Series
Six laps on Clark International Speedway
Five days with an IONIQ 5 N
Four litres of fully-synthetic lubricant
Three fast cars at my disposal
Two turbochargers
One for the road (non-alcoholic, don’t drink and drive) 🎶
Merry Christmas, fellow motorists.🎄
